This is a completely different kind of post from what I would normally post on here, but I need a place to share my heart and this is about the only semi-appropriate platform that I have where I can share this. So, Enjoy.
Over the past few weeks I have been burdened with a problem that is not new to man, but it is more real than ever in my life right now. This new understanding that I am going through will be tough to explain, but I have to try. I am learning more and more recently that there are many bitter, angry, mean, and hateful people in this world. But that is not new to me, I have always known that. What is new is realizing how many of those people are simply mis-informed. Let me say that again: Most of the mean, hateful people in this world are acting on the partial information that they have received. Many times the information that they justify all of their anger and their bitterness on, is not even true.
Do you understand that? I have seen 3 very serious examples of this in the last 3 weeks. Situations where friends and/or family have spewed anger, bitterness, and hatefulness all over the place, and all over the people who I love, simply because they do not understand the whole picture of what is going on.
In no way do I claim to be exempt from this “bitterness bias”. I have to admit that I tend to react to and believe the first “side of the story” that I hear just like many of the people who I have on my heart. But how long can one go before they step back, and realize the fact that there are two sides to every story. Does that ever happen? Then I must also ask: Is there any bitterness or anger in my life that is illegitimate because I do not know the truth about the situation.
I want to share just a few details about one scenario, but I will do it in a way as not to offend anyone, because my desire in writing this is not to make anyone upset, but to simply encourage them to find the truth, or at least understand where some of my family and I are coming from.
I Love My Dad! In fact, I am pretty sure that I love him more than anyone in this whole world second to my Mom and maybe my sister, but I doubt it :). He has made some poor choices in the last year, but that does not mean that I do not love him. My greatest desire regarding my Dad, is that he would be restored and reunited with my Mom. There are however some biblical principles that must be exemplified before everything can be normal again. Repentance, Love, Trust and Time,are a few things that must be a part of this restoration.
Until repentance is shown, things can never be normal. Without repentance there is no remission of sins. We should never pretend that things are normal, if repentance has not been shown.
Yesterday, Will and I went and got a haircut. As we were walking out to the car, Will took off towards the road and I very forcefully said: “WILL, STOP! DO NOT TAKE ANOTHER STEP”. The argument could be made that I do not love my son because of the tone that was used at that moment, but that argument would be absurd. I was bold and firm, maybe even harsh sounding to some, but it was not because of anger, it was because of my love for Him. I was direct because I was concerned about his life, his health, his future. I want the best for his life, so I will do whatever I can to protect him.
I think that this illustration applies to my relationship with my Dad. I love my Dad, way more than any critic loves him, way more than his enablers love him, and way more than the people who will just pretend with him like everything is ok. My desire is not that we pretend like things are great, but that we deal with the sin, Restore and Reunite for God’s glory, then things really will be great.
If this offends anyone please let me know, like I said: My desire is not that anyone would be offended by this, but simply that a few people, including my Dad, would understand my love and my heart during this time.
I think there is a huge lesson in this that I want to remember and it may help you out as well: Who are you bitter with? Who are you angry with? When you read the word Hate, who do you think of? Well, don’t gossip about them, don’t just delete them off your facebook, deal with it. With an open heart, and a godly spirit, and the humility of Christ, deal with it.